Random Ramblings

Reflections on my walk with God


I am cloth

Words that were “given” to me one night several years ago.
I was struggling with my young daughter while my husband was working way from home. It felt like I couldn’t hold everything together … My life was unravelling..

I am cloth.

The weft and the warp are the threads of my life.
Each thread has its place – its direction.
The threads cannot stand alone.
Alone they have no meaning.
It is only when they are brought together that the pattern emerges.
I am woven by The Master Craftsman,
The Weaver who never takes his eye off the pattern,
The Lord who knows what will be seen when the cloth is complete.
I am the cloth – I cannot see what I will look like.
The mirror gives a pale and distorted view.
Only when I look through His eyes can I see the whole.
His deft direction never stops – He makes no mistakes.
His creation is flawless.
But I am flawed.
I thought that I could weave my own life.
I thought that I could choose the direction of the weft and the warp.
I have chosen threads which do not fit the pattern.
I have run the threads in the wrong direction.
Now the cloth is twisted and the pattern is obscured.
I cannot straighten the cloth,
I cannot restore the pattern.
But The Lord is the Master craftsman who is above all others.
He can take this cloth and mend it.
The pattern will be restored – perfect as it should be,
Beautiful to behold, and a reflection of its Creator.


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Letting go

It is almost 16 years since my lovely Mum died of breast cancer. I am grieving again – the pain of loss has hit me hard and I am surprised after all this time that’s it is still there grinding away. I have given it to God so many times …and then taken it back. We are clearing Mum and Dad’s house – he is still with us but moved into a residential home. Going through all of their possessions has taken me back in time. The pain is immense, the loss immeasurable. I weep while I write and need to let go one more time.
For good.

I need to let go

Let go of the past

Let go of the pain of loss

Let go of the stuff that clutters my life

Let go of the things that bind me to the past

Let go of the self-image that is not real

Let go of the what-ifs and if-onlys

Let go of the things that hinder my growth in God

Let go of self so that I can embrace Christ

Just let go … And let God